Sex and love
When it comes to the novels on the side, women and men perceive treason in different ways. In one study, 202 men and women were interviewed. They were asked a question: what is the big betrayal of the idea that a spouse (or spouse) has sex with someone else, or that he (she) became spiritually close to someone else? The overwhelming majority of women (85 percent) said that it was more difficult to endure the second, while men (60 percent) admitted that the thought that their wife was sleeping with another was unbearable.
The reason, researchers believe, lies in human nature and the difference between the sexes. Men by nature are more concerned that women belong only to them, while women value emotional closeness more.
“Of course, women would prefer their husbands to remain faithful to them physically and spiritually,” notes Shirley Glace, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist, a member of the American Association for Family and Marriage Therapy. But wives, no doubt, are more afraid of the emotional rapprochement of their husbands with another woman than purely sexual relationships. It is unbearable for women to think that their husbands share intimate details of their relationship with another. They take it as a terrible insult. ”
It can not be said that the husband’s love comforts on the side do not touch them at all. "Women may be stunned by the thought of a rival," adds Dr. Slater. They are furious. Sometimes, in their own tales, they became heated to such an extent that it amazed them. Perhaps the reason lies in the insecurity of women in themselves, and the idea of comparing with another causes in them feelings of inferiority and humiliation.
Even in a state of overwhelming jealousy, a woman is more likely than a man to blame herself for her husband's having an affair. She is tormented by doubts: why am I not good at him? what am I doing wrong?
For his part, the husband perceives his wife’s treason somewhat differently. First of all, it is a blow to his male "I." "Sometimes a husband cannot believe that his wife, who has shown so much passion with him, can be someone else's ardent lover."