No rules of the game
Since you are giving birth, and not someone else, it is abundantly clear that the instructor, who has the rules of the game ready, is not at all what you need. “What you really need,” says Deborah Gowen, is a person who is ready to help, who is next to you not to dictate your will, but to meet your wishes. Even if you give birth for the first time, your instinctive impulses may be more correct despite the fact that they conflict with what is accepted in the hospital, with what you were taught in courses for pregnant women, and with your own habits.
In our practice, continues Dr. Gowen, we are adapting to a woman. If she wants to sleep, we let her sleep. If she expresses a desire to be like, we give her a be like. If she wants to be a good boy or, on the contrary, behaves terribly, let it be so. She can cry like a small child, declare that she wants to go home, lock herself in a dark bathroom and not talk to anyone and nobody will be indignant. This is such a moment in her life, when, no matter what she says, no matter what she does, no matter how she behaves, everything is permissible for her. ”
A woman who, during labor, is allowed to behave as she wants, next to which the assistant is always present, often has less need for painkillers. Indeed, a number of studies have shown that women who use the services of assistants are not necessarily from among the medical staff, everything goes much easier. Their delivery in general is progressing faster, less frequently requires medical intervention, including cesarean section, and in mothers and in newborns complications are less common. Researchers suggest that the presence of an assistant helps to relieve a great deal of anxiety, and this, due to unknown mechanisms, has a positive effect on the course and outcome of labor.