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Funny sms, sms greetings, sms jokes [page 2]

I am a stranger and I settled in your mobile. At the moment, when you press the buttons, I have sex with your finger, and I know that you like it, because you smile.

Three monkeys just escaped from the zoo: one was found at the Christmas tree, the second was not found, and the third was just noticed reading this SMS

This is SMS virus 2006! He has already made his way through the buttons of your mobile phone through your fingers and already has you in the anus, and I know that you like it, because you smile

Listen, do not press so much on the buttons, I'm hot, and generally remove your hand, otherwise I see nothing!

At the moment, there are 2 million people in the world asleep, 1 million are eating, 0.5 million are making love, and only one person I really love read my SMS.

How to conquer a woman? Take care of her, take care of her, love her, make her compliments, respect her. How to conquer a man? Get undressed and serve a bottle of beer!

If we release a guy in the forest, he will collect 3 kg of berries, if a girl is 5 kg. But this does not mean that if we release both of them into the forest, they will collect 8 kg of berries. :)

How to conquer a woman? Take care of her, take care of her, love her, make her compliments, respect her. How to conquer a man? Get undressed and serve a bottle of beer!

Congratulations! You won a gypsy girl in the lottery! If you do not pick up the prize within 14 days, then we will send a whole camp!

Your perfect shape, your skin is tender, your smell is driving me crazy, you have amazing eyes. From my one touch you start .... My favorite Ferrari F50 :) )))
Beeline informs: You sent a sweet magic dream! You can pick up the package in bed favorite! Good night!

Dating Club: "Who is over thirty!"

The secretary had such a bust that she could only work on the computer blindly.

Good to be an alcoholic, How to sail a boat on the streets!

Can't find the key to the heart of a woman? Try to pick to another place!

He is jealous of everyone, indiscriminately. Even to those with whom I have never slept.

Our team will go to the World Cup !!! They collected 5 labels from Snickers!

My childhood was difficult! Up to 5 years old, I thought that my name was SHUT UP!

Mental attack - sailors on zebras!

The first deception in life? NIPPLE!

Give advice to you girlfriend: Never you do not be shy, If a guy changes, Come and beat in the face!

If a guy laughs at you, spit in his face, let him choke.

If you want to marry a smart, beautiful and rich, you will have to marry three times.

A good manicure can decorate not only the hands of a woman, but also the face of a man!

Man - a mysterious phenomenon. It is absurd to try to understand a creature that pees while standing.

We were and remained goddesses, Reducing the madness of their bodies. Let those who did not get to us lick, Let those who did not want us die!

Do not argue with men, anyway, they are never right.

I’d better not find friends, Well, maybe I can, if I wanted ... But, just where can I say this one to take, What would you like, how could you stand ...

Do not be sad, and then the chest will not grow.

The reason is not clear, But due to the whim of the creator, The body of every man, Begins from the end!

Tired of critical days? Change the floor!

There are many laws in life, Two rules to remember for a start: It is better to starve than to eat, And it is better to be alone than to anyone.

The prince can wait all his life, and man, every day is needed.

You can live and not fall in love, By a little bit all love. To try to deceive everyone, But not to be deceived!

Guys what a watch. They need to start every day.

Favorite (s), like you, was not, no, and not necessary!

Without a bazaar I say: - Baby, I love you!

Attention! Virus! He sneaked into my phone book, chose the most beautiful, kind and intelligent man there and sent him this SMS ...

I want you! I want to turn your head, drag you to bed and make you feel hot, and you moaned for a whole week! Your flu!

I want everything with you all at once, but I get nothing and gradually.

Today I put 1,000 kisses, 500 beautiful dreams, and 100 sweet thoughts on the bill in your heart. And when you will miss me. Withdraw them from the account.

You brought me to the point that I missed beyond recognition.

Hello sunshine! It's snowing in the street, a cold wind, and my tent was stolen. Let go to spend the night.

You are like Bounty - a piece of Paradise on the planet.

I do not eat breakfast in the morning. thinking of you. In the afternoon I do not eat lunch, I think about you. I do not have dinner in the evening - I think about you. I do not sleep at night - I want to eat!

I love myself!

My heart is open to you. Come and see what is hidden there.

Kitty you are my ... saber-toothed!

For your sake, I would go anywhere, even to the ends of the earth! Do you promise me to stay here?

Dear, to soften my sadness for you? Maybe the knowledge that you miss me too? I hope you don’t feel sorry for a few cents, and you will write me a text message!

75 rubles were withdrawn from your personal account. on the landscaping of the moon. Thank you for your help, lunatics.

Darling, get up! No, you all get up!

You sent a sweet magic dream! Package can pick up in bed favorite (oops)!

Call or send sms, forgot (a) what your voice looks like.

Your eyes are a bottomless well. I look at them and drown in infinity, from which ... breathes cold and damp.

You will pass by - pass.

I want you to know that our friendship means a lot to me! You cry - I cry! You laugh - I laugh! You jump out of the window ... I look, and ... I laugh again!

Do you believe in love at first sight? Or do I pomolit your eyes again?

Attention - this message was sent from another galaxy with a purpose, to find the most beautiful and kind person. Now it is found. It's you!

Write sms or my heart will not withstand atmospheric pressure!

Do not look for me, do not call, do not send SMS, I do not want to talk to you, I do not want to see you, I do not want to hear you, because the doctor forbade me sweets ...

Get out of my thoughts. You interfere with work.

I am in the police. They took me and started the case. Reason: too beautiful. They have all the evidence on hand. I'm confused. Help me

Recipe for love: 500g. passion, 300g. love, add kisses and hugs to taste. The dish is ready. PS to try together in bed, preferably with me.

What you are watching? SMS arrived?

Dear subscriber, you are disabled for squandering state secrets! “SMS Service Center”

He came to me one night, had my body, drilled and made him feel, and when he was full, he just disappeared, fucking mosquito!

Wake up your conscience, call me!

You do not want to be a toy, in any hands. Alien will to be obedient in plans and deeds. But you like to play toys. Maybe you play with me?

When the stork brought you to your parents - they laughed for a long time and at first wanted to take a stork.