Why a aching person takes life energy + ways to increase emotional health
Emotional process, emotional phenomenon, emotional state, emotion ( from lat. Emoveo - shock, excite), slang. affect ( from lat. affectus - passion, emotional excitement) - a psychophysiological process that motivates and regulates activities (behavior, perception, thinking), reflecting the subjective meaning of objects and situations, and presented in consciousness in the form of experience. Among emotional processes, emotions, emotions, feelings and moods are distinguished.
Emotional health is extremely important for our well-being, it largely determines the degree of satisfaction with life and even success. People who are able to maintain a good emotional state, have better relations with other people, are optimistic and friendly. Perhaps because they feel more natural and comfortable being who they really are.
There are many problems in our life, our relatives and friends have them, we often have to listen to complaints about something or someone. On the one hand, people want to somehow relieve tension, talk, and we naturally contribute to this. On the other hand, the constant listening to other people's complaints takes energy from us. The ability to show empathy and empathy is considered a positive quality. But it is important to show them correctly. If after talking with another person you feel exhausted, then you need to think about whether to change your behavior.
Negative person influence
Some people talk about their problems to get support and advice. And others - to transfer their negativity to another. One must learn to distinguish.
Maybe people in the second category will call you an insensitive egoist when you refuse to follow their lead. Maybe they will try to inspire guilt or something else unpleasant.
Not scary. Compensation will be a surge of energy and a sense of self-esteem after refusing toxic communication.
Why you should not listen to complaints
Because the one who only complains does nothing to change his life. He is accustomed to be in the role of the offended. Such is his psychotype, such a worldview.
Will you listen to him, and with what help? Nothing. He does not need help, he needs to talk. A conversation without a goal does not make sense.
Complaining, he subconsciously, and sometimes, consciously relieves himself of guilt for his failure.
A specialist who knows how to influence the way of thinking should work with such people.
The greatest negative impact on a person is exerted by his own thoughts about the bad.
You will never solve the problem of ever complaining, because he does not intend to solve them. You will never console his soul with compassion, because he does not need it.
All he strives for is to find release from responsibility for his fate. That is, to the impossible.
What happens to us when we constantly listen to complaints
We give energy to nowhere. We want to help, but the solution to the problem does not come. We try again and again and as a result we are exhausted.
First signs of exhaustion
- Emotional imbalance
- Difficulties with solving your own problems
- Concentration problems
- The emergence of negative thoughts
What can we do to not complain about complaining
Set and keep distance
Perhaps the complainant will be offended at first by indifference. But in fact, if everyone stopped listening to his endless conversations about the futility of being, he would have to finally solve his problems, instead of just talking about them, or stop focusing on the bad.
To make it clear to the complainant that there is no one to appoint responsible for what is happening, except for himself
Suppose you heard a person. If so, then take the time to honestly tell him that there is a local problem that he complains about, and there is a more global one, which consists in his negative attitude to the situation and to life in general.
Do not show "weakness"
The complaining person is a manipulator. Do not show him your readiness to follow his lead. So you will destroy two - yourself and him. The negative activity of the person who complains to you will never stop. Having exhausted you, he will find himself another victim.
Ask him to respect your right to privacy. As well as a choice of conversation topics. You can say that you don’t want to talk about “tragedies and troubles” all the time. Then the person will be forced to distract from the negative.
The easiest ways to boost your emotional health
Do not forget about your physical health
The ability to endure discomfort is a very valuable ability. However, do not forget about the needs of the body. Make sure you get enough sleep at least 4 out of 7 days. This will help recover.
Eat well, this will give strength and energy to the body. Exercise regularly. As well as improving our physical health, exercise can help prevent and even cure minor levels of depression.
As the saying goes, there are physical exercises that can replace the effects of drugs, but there are no medicines that can replace the effects of physical exercises.
You do not have to sign up for any club or gym, brisk walking and small exercises are quite suitable. Do it with joy.
Get rid or minimize your bad habits. Cigarettes and alcohol harm both your physical health and emotional state. The abuse of various drugs can also cause great long-term harm to health. Throw all these substitutes for joy.
Drive yourself into fresh air and sunlight. Sunlight helps the body regulate itself and stimulate organs and systems.
Learn to read your emotions
Emotions make our life more colorful. They tell us what is good and what is not. Short-term emotions are called affect, long-term emotions are called mood.
The ability to understand and talk about emotional experiences prevents psychosomatic illnesses. Pleasant emotions are usually not disturbing, although they can also deprive us of sleep.
More disturbing are just unpleasant and heavy emotions. They always want to get rid of them. However, we also need them. First, they help us understand the significance of what is happening.
Secondly, unpleasant emotions make you do something to make a difference. Thirdly, emotions point the way to conflicts, which makes our life more difficult.
A change in mood, although it affects our behavior, still suggests that there is a reason that is not always visible. This reason is worth finding. Hence, be not a slave, but the master of your mood.
Parasitism does not add emotional health and constricts emotional experiences. Find what you can do well enough and turn it into a regular exercise. It doesn’t matter that it doesn’t matter how much money it brings to you, it’s important how much joy you can get from professional activities.
Find what you can call yourself a professional in: accounting, teaching at school, driving a car, cooking, etc. Learn and develop, reach the heights of an expert in your field.
The field of activity is one of the main areas of life that allows you to feel your usefulness and relevance, and hence the feeling of your own value.
Offer free help sometimes
Simply do good and "throw it into the water." Do not expect anything in return. Besides the fact that you are doing big and important things, some help to someone will give you the opportunity to feel yourself a little higher, more detached from the material, and therefore less dependent and free from it.
Besides just helping someone a lot, it’s also helpful in strengthening your self-esteem. It is important that you do this with real joy and meaningfulness.
Learn to find some time for yourself.
We all need to be alone from time to time. And this is very important. In everyday hustle and bustle, sometimes there is no time to reflect on what has been achieved, overestimate your goals, values, relationships, problems at last.
Vanity can actually be an “escape” from problems, allowing us to temporarily create the illusion that everything is in order and under control. Therefore, sometimes it is necessary to stop and look around, to understand what is going well and what is not as we would like.
This time for yourself may look completely different, but this time should belong only to you. Plan it to spend without fuss. Whether it’s taking a hot bath, meditation and thinking, or collecting model airplanes, everyone should from time to time focus on our own interests and needs.
Find your hobby. It is quite normal to have difficulties and problems. Life practically consists of constant difficulties and solving problems. And this can not be avoided. However, if problems and difficulties become the only content of your life, then you have real problems and you need to urgently change something.
Find something for which you can fully surrender and have fun. This will help you maintain balance, it is better to get in touch with yourself, which is actually very important.
Freeing up our creative side, we feed the emotional half of the brain, and this allows us to discover something new and look at problems from a completely different point of view. In addition, interest and curiosity can become an additional meaning that will protect you from the fear of doing something wrong, because you are already interested.
Make creativity your personality trait. Pay attention to something new, unusual. Try to look in which area of your life you could apply it, try to diversify your life.
Spend time with people
There are always people around us on whom we spend our emotional strengths and those who give us strength. The first ones will always be enough in your life.
Therefore, spend time with people who positively influence you, with people whom you admire and whose company you can enjoy, or who serve as an example for you.
You may be inspired and delighted with the traits you want to develop in yourself. Maybe you just have a great time in their company, and this will help you feel good, become even friendlier to others and have an even better opinion of yourself.
Forget about the TV or computer for a while
Modern technologies occupy an increasingly large part in our lives, which is actually not very bad. Modern technologies allow erasing territorial boundaries and communicating with those with whom it would simply be impossible. But at the same time, they can still serve as a tool to hide from reality or temporarily disconnect from pressing problems and difficult relationships.
In other words, they sometimes pull us out of reality and sometimes for a long time. Moderation is needed, just don’t take them all the time. If you want to have real and good relationships and connections, you should go out and meet people, chat with them lively, but here you need practice.
Emotions are energy, which means it cannot be stored for a long time, otherwise it will fade away. You need to part with emotions on time. Most often this is done in the process of communication. The accumulation of negative emotions leads to problems in physical health.
Communication is a great coach. Only face-to-face communication will allow you to develop your communicative competence, which means receiving and transmitting more joy in communication.
Look to the future
An Eastern proverb says: "live in this world, do good in this world, but strive for a better world." Look and determine what you can improve in your life. You need to know what you want in order not to miss the moment when you already have it.
When there is an alluring goal ahead, it serves as a kind of emotional battery that nourishes your mood. Do not leave yourself for a long time without clear and alluring goals. Waking up every day in the morning, find something that will give you joy and will illuminate the movement towards the goal.
Know your values
Define your most basic values of life and be able to articulate them in words. This is what allows us to feel truly independent and self-sufficient.
Our values belong only to us, it is practically impossible to take them away, which means we have something that cannot be lost. The feeling of the presence of such values is a powerful factor in supporting our mood, dedication to life and, accordingly, emotional health.
By following these simple steps, you should soon begin to see the difference in your emotional health. If you still feel that the situation is not improving, then perhaps the time has come to seek professional help from a therapist. Remember, it’s not so important what problems you have, how much you deal with them.
Via takprosto.cc & psychologyjournal.ru