The dictionary of the beginning manipulator: Phrases that cause unconsciously to obey
Annoyance, anger, disappointment, resentment. Confusion, guilt, shame. Fatigue, fear, discontent. This is just a brief list of feelings that a person can call out from others if he or she practices a little in the art of manipulation, or abyuza. Abyuzer - a profession of honor and dignity - given how many people are engaged in this craft.
First, it makes a person feel like a nonentity. And then generously gives the opportunity to get rid of the inferiority complex, allowing to do for themselves a service, presented as a good deed.
"Others without legs - and nothing" and "I would have your problems" is a classic way of making it clear that the feelings of the other do not concern you more than the lack of toilet paper in Venezuela.
"But you're smart" and "This one was born" - is in demand in the female practice of manipulation, does not allow the object to feel attractive. Use it if you need a free labor, which will never marry, and in case of luck it will not even lose its virginity.
"I want to? "I do not talk to you" and "Yours is not here" - simple enough tricks, nevertheless are suitable for pre-suppressed subjects who already guess that the price of their desires is on the market day of a nickle.
"No offense, but ..." and "Know how to take criticism" is a great way to safely spit someone in the eye under the guise of good intentions. If you want to humiliate someone, but do not want to learn the subject of his professional work.
"And you where, with your data" and "This is for your own good" - the so-called false care, works with inexperienced clients, such as puberty teenagers. Those who want to tie an object to him and not let him separate.
"But with Taras better" - a popular prescription for reducing self-esteem, surprisingly well affects people of any age. For wide application in marriage and upbringing.
"You are always offended" and "This is a joke" - options for retreat, if the object resists.
"Live with mine," "Do not argue with the elders" - elegantly reduces the opponent's competence to zero. So you explain that everyday experience is always equal to the sum of lived years, so he can keep his opinion to himself. It is best if the disputant at the same time depends on you financially.
"Grow up", "What are you like as a little" and "Let's be serious". Seriousness is a great weapon for someone who does not have arguments. "Serious person" by definition is better, smarter and earns more frivolous. It's no wonder that serious people are most often met among cloakroom attendants, museum workers, passport offices, car inspectors and other people with high incomes.
"You have to be able to spin," "Others at your age already ..." and "It's high time to understand that ..." - nobody canceled the household aplomb of Zoshchenko's heroes? and this must be used. Stick to all known norms of who and at what age is bound to achieve what. In case of bewilderment, apply the construction
"This is any fool knows" - she invariably discourages.
Starting with the topic "I raised you with these hands", the client goes through the stages "I gave the best years" to the grave "All my life I laid on you". Tremor, enuresis, depressed reflexes, loss of libido and weight, increased blood pressure, disability or suicide - a brief list of the consequences of chronic guilt.
"Be a man" and "Do not be a woman . " In order to meet their gender in the eyes of others, people are ready to go to much. And manipulators use it.
"Come on without the snot" and "Gather, rag" - a ban on emotions.
"Look at yourself" and "What people will say?" - the emergence of dependence on public opinion.
"You are such an egoist" means in translation: "My desires are more important than yours . " Accustomed to self-sacrifice, causeless disregard for their interests and needs.
"You are already thirty years old" and "And when are the children?" - a feeling of incompatibility with the standards.
"Go streets of vengeance" , "Cum on the panel" and "Get out on the lawyer and do what you want" - instilling a sense of fear of the future, in which you can be a failure if you do not take the actions indicated by the manipulator.
"Guess what I'm upset about , " "You should have guessed," and "I know what you meant" - a scribbling of a telepath's label that allows you to give up explanations for other thoughts and feelings unintelligible to others.
"And you always" and "And you never" - a reproach that acts as an indelible stamp and causes a sense of irreparability of the situation, hopelessness, apathy and passive aggression.
"And I told you , " "Now, what's the difference," and "Ah, everything!" - short phrases to strengthen the sense of wrong.
"No, it's all right, it's just ..." - a charming puzzle. The phrase in which is encrypted: "You did something wrong, guess yourself what . "
Confusion of doubt
"It was not at all" , "I never said that" , "It's not me, it's you" , "You made it up" , "You seemed to" , "You forgot, but I remember" and "You're lying" accusations and denials, after which one can doubt the correctness of their point of view and become confused in the testimony.
"I want you to be ..." - a hint that such, as it is, does not suit.
"People like you need ..." - pushing for actions under the guise of the need for self-improvement.
"Be above this" and "Be simpler" - the teaching to disable the protection mechanisms in critical situations and search for their causes.
"It's impossible to talk to you" means unwillingness to reach a compromise and shifts responsibility for this to another.
The term meaning "suggesting to the client doubts in his reason". In this method the decisive is the unshakable confidence: deny, catch up the fog, hint, mock and humiliate.
Customers never remember the details of the conversation; Moreover, they are not ready to distort their words, and distort events. As soon as the victim "swam", accuse as absurdly as possible that she felt that she was going crazy: "This was not at all" , "I never said that" , "It's not me, it's you" , "You came up with it" , "You thought" , "You forgot, but I remember" and "You're lying all the time . "
And the bonus: the legendary call of the abyuser given to us by Alexei Balabanov in the movie "Brother-2". Let's remember Danil Bagrov, who is pouring a woman into a cot with immortal words: "Come on!"
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